My two most beneficial exercises

Of the two exercises I completed during this course, I chose Loving Kindness and Visualization as the most beneficial. When I did the loving kindness I remember the feeling of complete freedom. I say freedom because after I allowed myself to be filled with love and compassion, I shared that love and compassion with a suffering loved one. Once that was done, I further shared my love with those that I didn't know, and even to those that I didn't care for. Being able to breathe in their suffering and spread my peace and wellness was liberating. It let me know that I have the ability to spread peace to others in the hopes that they will do the same and we will continue to share this path to wellness.

The visualization exercise allowed me to look at parts of my past that made me feel happy, whole, connected, and exuberant. I thought of two experiences where I was at my highest level of happiness and peace.  The experience where I was my most happy was when I was with my children when they were younger, about 5 years ago. I was carefree and relaxed, and even though I was pregnant, I had a lot of energy. Because it was springtime, I was in heaven as I smelled the fragrant flowers and listened to the birds sing in the morning. I would get off work at 5 o’clock when there was still 5 hours of daylight left and my boys and I would go swimming or go to the park and walk around. We would take long walks and look at the spiders that hung outside of the lighted marquis in front of the Walgreens. We’d have “sleepovers” on the weekend where we just laid on the couch all night and watched Disney and Nickelodeon all night. I had to be in the middle because both of my boys wanted to lie near me. I remember one time we even ate ice cream for dinner, that’s how happy I felt!

The time when I was most whole, connected and exuberant was when I spent the day at the beach by myself. It was early spring or late winter. The sun was bright and the sky was completely blue but it was chilly outside, like 40 degrees…and very windy!! Despite the wind and cold, I felt completely connected with the sand, the sun, and the water. I sat outside all day and wrote poetry and took pictures. The beach was empty so I felt like it was MY sand, my salt, my birds, my sun, my sky, and my wind. I felt like the perfect day was just for me.

I loved reliving those moments, and even though they’re gone, they’re still very much in my heart.  Mentally, the visualization exercise proved to me that I don’t need to have a lot of money or fancy trips to be at one with nature or be truly deeply happy. I don’t need to go around the world to find beauty and I don’t need to take a long vacation to come back relaxed. If I continue to think about that I will be able to transform myself to those places in an instant. Hopefully I'll have many more memories to tap into as time goes on, but for now, I'll enjoy the moments I have now.

Hanan 

~Seek Peace~

Unit 7 Meeting Aesclepius

Well folks,

Lets explore what's on my mind after completing the exercise for unit 7...Meeting Aesclepius.

This exercise has been a very real and meaningful experience for me. I laid down and allowed my mind to calm and quiet itself, having no idea what the exercise would have me focus on. When it said to think of a wise person, I had a few ideas to choose from, but I went with my Grandma Novella.  Grandma Novella and Grandpa Bigson were not my father's biological parents, they were actually his aunt and uncle, but they did raise my father until he was 15 years old and he referred to them as "mom and dad." After my father met his real mother, he still called Novella and Bigson "mom and dad" so as children, we called them Grandma and Grandpa.

I used Grandma Novella as my person of choice because she lived to be 85 years old and was the most kind, unselfish woman I had ever met. She never cursed, raised her voice, or had anything negative to say about anyone. Grandma Novella and Uncle Bigson couldn't have children so they were always taking in the kids of the community. Because there were 7 of us siblings, she stayed busy catering to us. She'd make cakes, biscuits, and other kinds of sweets and gave them away at will. After she got too old to cook, she recruited my mother and myself to help her with her recipes. Because Grandma Novella passed away over 10 years ago, it was hard to picture her face in my mind because I wanted to focus on the times before she got sick. She was a short fragile looking woman, but boy was she strong! Once I had her image in my head, it was easy to envision taking her essence and making it my own. The part where I had to take her essence into myself was a moving experience. I took a deep breath and allowed her white light to permeate my body and I know I inhaled for about 45 seconds! That is a long time for me, I'll tell ya! And when I was done inhaling, I felt full of her spirit.

Doing these exercises each week has gotten easier and easier for me. I know that I relax the best and the quickest when I am in a quiet room...namely,  my son's room...and I like the window open so I can hear the birds singing. If its raining outside, that's even better. After a few minutes, my mind is calm and I'm ready to take on the new exercise. Doing these mindfulness exercises has really calmed me overall. I am not as anxious or irritated. My patience level has risen dramatically and I dont harbor hostile or damaging thoughts as much as I used to. I definitely believe these mindfulness exercises will be a part of my daily life forever.

The statement "one cannot lead another where one has not gone him or herself" is a direct reflection on the experience of the teacher. One cannot teach from a superficial level. Instead they must delve deeper into the core of their respective practice. You can't know every intricate detail of something unless you've experienced it for yourself. Earlier in the semester there was a discussion asking if it was possible for a practitioner to teach something that he or she has not experienced first hand. Initially I said that it was possible given the practice and the practitioners ability to communicate.

Now, the more I think about it, and with regards to the above quote, I think that there are definitely some things that MUST be experienced first hand to properly understand and explain it. I think that even though we all may claim a particular religion, we can all have the same spirituality, meaning that though we call our individual Gods by a different name, we are all connected to a higher power. We all have a purpose that we should explore if we desire to be a whole person.

Depending on what profession I decide to pursue, I believe it will definitely involve clients, either on a individual level, or group level. If that's the case, I owe it to them to understand my own spirituality and to be at peace, or have a comfortable level of awareness about my physical and psychological well being. How can I convince someone to love themselves, accept themselves, and appreciate themselves, if I don't follow my own advice?

I can implement psychological and spiritual growth by reading my text books...and not just during the term, but afterwards, to reiterate the steps. I can also continue with my meditation and mindfulness exercises. After doing this exercise, I told my husband about it and suggested that he try it sometime today. I have also given my brother in Virginia information on the Loving-Kindness exercise and he is going to try to incorporate that practice into his daily meditation practices. Sharing this information with as many people as possible also makes me aware that I need to keep it up. I  mean, I can't tell others the importance of integral health if I'm not practicing it myself,  now can I?

It looks like I kind of got carried away, but that's what happens when I let my mind run free!

Thanks for reading,

~Seek Peace~

Unit 6 Loving Kindness and Integral Assessment

Hello again, and welcome to my mind...

The loving kindness exercise was more difficult than I expected it to be. Saying the outward intentions "may all individuals gain freedom from suffering" and may all individuals find sustained health, happiness and wholeness" is something similar to what I pray at night. I make special prayers for those that are homeless, sick, in need etc. But the further statements "may I assist all individuals in gaining freedom and suffering" and may I assist all individuals in finding health, happiness and wholeness" was a different scenario.

In general I do try to do my best to help others if they ask me. But i realize that there are many people out there that may be right in front of me that are suffering as well. I used to try and offer assistance to everyone around me, but it go to be too much. In fact, while I was shopping one day with my sons, we saw an elder gentleman walking through the parking lot of Kroger's. It was a very hot day at around 4 pm. The gentleman was using a cane and he was clearly a stroke victim because his left arm was disabled. I approached and after talking to him for a few minutes I learned that he lived at home with his nephew but no one takes him around to where he needs to go so he resorts to taking the bus. That particular afternoon, he had a ride lined up, but that ride fell through, so he was just walking. I agreed to take him to where he needed to be...which ended up being McDonald's. He was on blood pressure medicine and said he hadn't eaten all day.  I drove him to McDonald's where he insisted on repaying me for the ride by buying my sons a burger. We accepted the burger and sat with him to make sure he was OK until the next bus came. Thankfully the bus stop was right outside McDonald's so he said he would sit there for the next 2 hours and take the bus home. 

Before we left he asked if he should call me if I would take him to the places he needed to go. I didn't want to be rude and say no, but I did say that I stay very busy with my children and my disabled husband. Plus, I'm in school and don't have a lot of free time. He appeared to understand, but insisted that I give him my number, which I did. Now he calls me just about everyday needing a ride to different places. I feel terrible that I have to say no, but I did say that I didn't have a lot of free time.  I think he got offended and has since stopped calling me at all. I enjoyed talking to him, and i said I would help out when I'm free, but I just havent been free as I have had visitors from out of state that have taken all of my free time. And some times, I'm just tired!

I said all that to say that if I allow myself, I would spread myself thin trying to help everyone out and I'd forget about myself. I truly do want to help others, but does that mean that I have to always oblige those that ask me? Does it mean that I should feel guilty when I say no? I don't think so, but I also don't think i should only be used for other peoples needs. ( I really hope that doesnt sound mean).

With the integral assessment, I cant really say that I'm confident in any of the quadrants. I could definitely work on my interpersonal and  biological. I keep saying that I'm going to take steps to getting in shape but my life is so hectic that its hard enough for me to find 15 minutes of quiet to do my personal assessments. I keep saying that Im gonna do it, but I really want to start keeping my word.

Hanan

Unit 5 The Subtle Mind Discussion

Ok folks, time to share what's on my mind...

In doing the exercise for the subtle mind, I found that it was a lot more difficult. When I did the loving-kindness exercise, I was able to focus on the things I loved and turn that outer love and focus it on my self. After that, I attempted to turn that inner love and compassion and direct it to those that were suffering, and even to those that I didn't really care for. That exercise left me feeling full of great feelings and invigorated. For this exercise, I had to focus on either my breathing or the inhalation and exhalation of my breath in an attempt to clear my mind of all the unwanted thoughts. Despite my greatest efforts to focus on my breathing, I wasn't able to calm my mind for longer then a minute at a time.

But I do know why it was so difficult. My step children and one grand daughter are visiting for the weekend and of course they are loud and obnoxious! Well not obnoxious, but they are super loud!
In trying to calm my mind, I was constantly bombarded with "can I have some juice?" "I need a towel," or "What are we gonna do today?" Since I was trying to be a good hostess, I was turned to every direction except to my breathing. Soooo, after many attempts, I managed to find 10 minutes to devote to my thoughts, or my "not" thoughts.

Once I was able to clear my mind, I found that it was just as invigorating at the loving kindness exercise. Since spiritual, mental, and physical wellness are all connected, its safe to assume that in order for a person to be completely whole, they must thrive in each department. I do believe, though, that to have a healthy physical wellness you must have healthy spiritual and mental wellness. One can be physically handicapped or deformed, but as long as they have love and compassion, and a strong connection to their spiritual self, they can overcome whatever physical shortcomings they may have.

I once did an experiment on  myself several years ago. I had suffered from gallstones and I noticed that the more aggravated or anxious I got, the worse my pain would be. My ex husband and I were having marital problems and whenever I thought about how much I hated him, I would be in pain. So one day I was sitting in my bedroom and I allowed myself to calm down and think of the good times. I did that, and my pain went away. I was ecstatic! Unfortunately, it never occurred to hone those skills and continue to practice that exercise. Now, these many years later, it is all coming back to me.

I have been doing well with these exercise thus far, and I have every intention of keeping it up.

Hanan

Unit 4 Blog

Hey guys,

Welcome to my mind again!

I have to say that though it was hard getting started with the loving-kindness assignment, I was thoroughly satisfied with the results. In the beginning, I had to ask my husband over and over again to be quiet so I could concentrate. That defeated the purpose because he just upset me because I had to wait over 30 minutes! Even with headphones on, I could still hear him!

But after I laid down and relaxed my mind and body, I was ready to explore my thoughts. The sound of the water in the background was  very relaxing and the woman's voice was soothing. At first I had to narrow down which of my loved ones I wanted to focus on. And once I did that, it was good to go. I also had a hard time trying to focus loving thoughts for the ones I considered my enemies. Although there are only a couple of people I dislike, it was difficult sending them good thought. Other than that, I thought the exercise was helpful.

I have been doing the exercise every day for the entire week and while some instances its harder to get started, the outcome is just as rewarding.

I consider a mental workout to mean always focusing yourself to have positive thoughts. Evidence that shows that those engaging in regular mental workouts have less stress, sleep better, and have overall good mental and physical health. I can implement mental workouts by continuing to do the breathing exercises and constantly reminding myself that I am loved and that I have an unlimited capacity for love.

Hanan